I CAN Walk the Walk

A few days ago I picked up a new hobby. By hobby I mean something that I don’t really want to do, but feel the need to nonetheless. I started walking, on purpose, for “fun”. I’ve been at it for three days now, so naturally I am now a very experienced professional…at walking. I’ve learned a few things about walking, my home town and life in general. I hope this helps, enjoy.

An animated gif of a walk sequence.
An animated gif of a walk sequence. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It’s all downhill from here. Not!

You remember how your parents and grandparents used to tell stories about having to walk to and from school every day? And how that trip was always uphill? Both ways? Well, let me tell you something. They weren’t lying. I’ve come to find out that there is no downhill in this town. No, here “downhill” means a flat surface that connects all the uphill bits. Either that or so steep a grade that you will literally kill yourself if you try it.

Where are we going?

It seems like it’s best to have a destination in mind before you take off. The first morning I set out to visit the cemetery. I didn’t know how long of a walk this would be, or how long it would take. I just wanted to see if I could do it. It turned out to be a piece of cake. From my apartment to there is about 1.3 miles. I ended up taking tome detours so I imagine it was about 1.5 miles each way. A three-mile walk seems okay, a good starting point.

The next day I figured on getting some new scenery. I decided to drive out to our park and to walk around there. From the previous day I knew that it took me about 90 minutes to finish my walk, so I just figured on walking for 90 minutes. It wasn’t as good because I had nowhere to go. I was just going in circles. It was extremely boring and I didn’t have the motivation to go the entire 90 minutes, so today I went back to the original idea and walked out to the cemetery again. It was much easier today. And I found something else out. Just because you’re walking around a cemetery doesn’t mean you won’t find opportunities to chuckle. Please forgive me Mr. Smallwood.

Do all dogs go to heaven?

I’m an animal lover. A dog person, cat person…you name it I’m that person. (Reasonably saying though. Snakes and all like animals are horrible. Keep them away from me.) Something changes though when you’re walking down the sidewalk. Now, if I run into another person walking, with a dog in tow everything is fine. That dog is happy. It’s out walking, peeing and pooing on everything in sight. Tail wagging, they just can’t wait to see me and say hello. Chained up dogs or dogs behind a fence, that’s a different story. They don’t like me much. Actually, they not only don’t like me, they want to END ME!

What a normal person hears as they walk by is woof, woof, bark, bark. What I hear is die, die, kill, kill. Don’t worry though; I’ve got my Son of Sam tendencies under wraps.

Have you picked up any new “hobbies” lately? Maybe I need to find a different new one.

From the "You Know You're From Monett if" Facebook Page. Part of my walk is on this trail.
From the “You Know You’re From Monett if” Facebook Page. Part of my walk is on this trail.

12 thoughts on “I CAN Walk the Walk

  1. I’ve known you in our younger days of crowder. I think that this post was a true inspiration. I had to walk to my destination this morning and then read this post. I truly think its a sign that I should begin walking more. Thanks for the inspiration!!

  2. Walking is a wonderful hobby. I have to agree with you on the need for a purpose or a destination. And yeah, watch out for those scary dogs lurking behind fences with nothing but ripping your leg off as you walk by on their mind.

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