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Oh, Okay (The Ballad of Short Bus Special) A Movember Post

You know that friend we all have that stands up during introductions and says “Hi, I’m the CRAZY one”? Yeah, this is about that friend.

I asked Short Bus if he minded me writing a post about him with a couple of pictures, and that I wouldn’t use his real name. His response to this was;

That’s fine. Hell use my name if you want. You need me to talk in front of people…. I can do that too. I’ve been near death so many times with and without cancer….

So, Short Bus is not his real name, but it’s what I’m going to use throughout this post, and I am going to show some pics. Like this one.

Brother Jon and Short Bus. It is a coincidence that we are in the ‘Fun Bus’ together, I think

I guess the best place to start is in the beginning, so here we go. I met Short Bus (SB) while helping out with my first Jaycees event, the First Annual Jaycees Haunted House. I had joined the group a few months before and decided to get involved because they needed someone to draw the layout. I’m a good drawer. SB got involved because Halloween is his thang. SB had worked with our 2011 Chapter President and she asked him to help. I think he would have helped regardless, which will be evident later on in the post. Now, some from his beginnings.

At seven years old he was involved in a car accident. The car he was riding in was struck by a drunk driver, on the Fourth of July. Since then he has been a little leery of traveling on that night, which is a shame cause he really likes to blow things up. (Fireworks that is.) After the accident his mother was told that she should consider buying a cedar box. He didn’t succumb that time, or this one.

Around fourteen he was diagnosed with testicular cancer. It was removed, successfully, but it landed him a new nickname. His wife attended high school with him. She told me that for the longest time she never could figure out why some of the kids called him uno. Do I need to explain this? Have you ever played the card game Uno? When you have only one card left you holler out Uno. Well, SB only had one downstairs “card” left. But, he wasn’t done there.

A young SB.

Sometime within the last six or seven years he was out cutting wood with a chainsaw. Somehow, someway, he ended up cutting his arm with it. On the way to the hospital they decided to stop off for a bite to eat, I believe they had a hankering for a Wendy’s Frostie. You can’t really blame him, those things ARE super delicious. They attempted to glue his wound up, and he held it while they ate. Not sure how that ended, but I can say that he still has both arms.

Most recently he’s shown off his manliness in a different way. A week ago the Jaycees held an event to help raise money for the various Christmas programs that go on each year. This fundraiser included a chili supper, pie auction, and something else known as a “paddle party”. Now, it’s not that kind of paddle party you heathens. This paddle party includes all sorts of vendors (Mary Kay, 31, Miche Bags, etc) that all put up two items to be auctioned off. How it works is when you get there you have the opportunity to buy up to four “paddles”. If an item comes up that they want they will put up any number of paddles they want, as long as they put a quarter a piece in a bucket for them. If your number is called you win the prize. The predominate people that come to these are the ladies. As a matter of fact, only one guy purchased any paddles that night. Can you guess who?

SB sat there for about an hour, listening to the vendors do their spiel. Time after time they hollered for the “ladies” to put there paddles up, and time after time we gave him a hard time for being a “lady”. He didn’t care though, not at all. I may have dos amigos, he still has the sack of a lion, or some other beastly animal. Titanium I tell you. Doesn’t much care what people think, and will stand up for every single persons right to think the way they want.

A year after we met he was reintroduced to a girl he went to high school with. She came and helped us clean up at the Second Annual Jaycees Haunted house. She got in there and made a hand, without any one even asking. I can also remember her bumming smokes to me. Instant step up on the cool ladder, at the time. A year after that they were married, on Halloween day. The service was wonderful, and the reception was something special. For the reception they had a costume party. There was candy everywhere. It was wonderful.

SB photo bombing our Easter Photo. Super secret….that is Bruddah in the bunny suit, hung over. Ha Ha Ha

I was baptized exactly a month before this. A couple of months later  a gave my first talk at Church. During one of our Jaycees meetings a member announced that I would be speaking and that everyone should come to support me. Someone asked which Church and she told them. Out of the corner of my ear I could hear SB say “Jon’s a Mormon? That’s weird.” He came up to me and asked about it. After telling him that it was all right we talked about how if I were to join a Church, the LDS Church is the one he can respect me for the most. He and his family enjoy the Elders, when they come around.

He is also in the roller derby now a days. That is where I came up with his “blogger name” Short Bus. He had thought about using the name The Uni Nutter, but inevitably settled on Short Bus Special. He is the reason that I am maintaining a creeper styled mustache for Movember. I’ve been called Hitler I don’t know how many times. That is all for you SB. Keep on keeping on, for you are not just meant to be alive. No sir, you are meant to live, and live you do.

Short Bus Special in action


29 thoughts on “Oh, Okay (The Ballad of Short Bus Special) A Movember Post

  1. Brother Jon,
    UNO: Great post.
    Secondo: Thank you for sharing this story.
    You went above and beyond for Bloggers for Movember.
    Le Clown

  2. Ya know since the Doctor keeps running off with all those companions all the time, I’m thinking I’ll stick with Shortbus. He’s a pretty spectacular guy and I’m more than a little partial.

  3. I am humbled by you kind words and coming from you they do mean a lot to me. I have the up most respect for you and the path you have found to lead you through life. I never really thought about what my life or how I live it looks from the outside. I hope that I continue to affect people in a positive way and help them realize that even when life seems to at its worse, there is ALWAYS something to smile about.

    And yes my wife is awesome in more ways then I can count at times. She helped me through chem by whispering French into my ear. Needless to say I was always the last one to get up from their seat….

    Now you have most of what you know correct but you are also missing more… So much more!!!

    There is my birth…. Almost a 11 lb baby with a peteit mother….
    Fight with a toilet seat at 3…. Found out men suffer from arackursackaphobia…..
    The ghost of the hair dryer…. Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr…..
    Turning yellow for a day because my body thought it was tasty….

    Maybe a short bus ballad II… You can call it…. Wait for it….

    The Great Ballad Of Uno Momento!

    Yes there is a story behind the title and yes I have tons of nicknames because of some of my exploits. What is life without a few scars and heart aches….

    1. Yep. I have a black SUV that is dirty, often. His daughter will always mark in the dirt, writing notes and such. He once got her to write “I love Steve” or something like that. When I asked who Steve was he calmly said “the guy you have man sex with.” This was incredibly funny to me, and he said the only reason he said that was cause he knew I would laugh.

  4. He sounds awesome. Way to go, Short Bus.
    They have Roller Derby around here? Sweet! I just watched Whip it yesterday.

    Hitler?? your stash is NOT a Hitler stash.

    …. Frostie….

    1. Yeah, he “plays” in Springfield. That’s a good movie.

      I know, but that doesn’t stop people from saying it…including your brother in law. It’s okay though, it’ll be gone come Friday.

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